


Close to perfect

by lyonessheart



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gay Marriage, M/M, Memory Loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-30
Updated: 2014-03-30
Packaged: 2018-01-17 13:45:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1389931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyonessheart/pseuds/lyonessheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His life is close to perfect. He is happily married to his blond, gorgeous husband and lives in a beautiful flat. All could be well - if not for a tiny problem. He doesn't remember getting married or anything about his life and neither does his lover.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Close to perfect

**Author's Note:**

> **Author's Notes:** Dear **fyernaice** \- I hope that you like what I have made of the prompt. I tried to fit everything you requested into the story - but the boys didn't like the idea of desksex yet. Everything else should be in there and I hope you like the length. I know that without my wonderful beta - the lovely **sophie_french** who cheered me on endlessly and has fought all of my commas and little mistakes, I probably would have given up. I am beyond nervous because so many people wanted to see this prompt written, so I hope I have done the expectations justice *wibbles*

Dizziness and nauseousness, the two sensations were almost overwhelming. He tried to fight the vertigo, that threatened to unbalance him. He was sure he hadn't drunk anything, but for some reason he had trouble standing up.

“Easy there, don't fall!” The hand that held him upright belonged to someone he couldn't quite place.

The stranger was blond, but that didn’t quite do the colour of his hair justice. What was on his head, appeared to be almost white, just like fresh spun silk.

When grey eyes met his, he became aware of two things.

A) He was more than a hundred percent sure that he knew this man, knew him on a level where words weren't necessary. His soul recognized him.

B) He didn't know his own name.

That alone made him sit down where he was, with no regards to dirt staining his backside. Why on earth did he not know his name? He dimly noted that he did not know much else either, but he had not the time to check what that might entail.

The blond looked at him with his startling grey eyes. He appeared to take his appearance in. Somehow he felt like an insect being dissected, but the slow smile stretching over the other’s features transformed the face before him into something that made his gut clench.

He was tall and had a sharp facial structure with too many angles to actually be pretty but it was mature enough to be called handsome. He was dressed in expensive jeans and a sweater, but what stood out most were his feet ensconced in expensive looking leather shoes – shoes with long pointed toecaps – that made his feet look incredibly huge!

“Hey!” The address was curt but not entirely impolite so he decided to approach the other cautiously. He greeted the stranger with a nod.

“You don´t happen to know how we got here? I have not yet looked for a clue but, to be honest I don't even remember my own name right now and I find that more than strange.”

The blond man inclined his head and said. “This is indeed more than strange – come to think about it, I don´t know my name either, I do have a hell of a headache too – maybe a concussion or so?”

He shrugged his shoulders as answer, and replied. “No idea, we probably should try to get medical attention.”

“Well it might be a good idea, although I have no clue where we should acquire such attention.”

A slender hand reached for him again and his companion smiled at him.

“It can't be very comfortable on the floor!”

But when he finally grasped the offered hand, something else grabbed his attention. He looked at their clasped hands and all that left his mouth was an incredulous:

“What the fuck?”

“I suppose we do either share the same fashion sense, or something else is going on.”

A thick silver band, made of an expensive metal, as far as he could tell, rested comfortably on the ring finger of his left hand. The exact same twin of his ring was to be found on his companion’s finger.

He panicked now for real. Hands on his shoulders grounded him slightly.

“Take a deep breath.” Since the alternative was hyperventilating, he took the advice and concentrated on getting the much needed air into his lungs.

“Okay, are you with me?”

He nodded, not really trusting his voice. How could the other guy be so calm?

“So look around, you regained your consciousness here, right?”

Another nod.

“Good, I woke up standing in front of it and found this in my coat pocket.” The blond held up a set of keys and what looked like a slip of paper.

“The address on this piece of paper appears to be for an apartment in the house, so maybe we should step inside and look around for a clue? Find out what is going on.”

What choice did they have? So he nodded and allowed the blond guy to step up onto the porch, the keys fit and the door opened. They stepped into an entry hall that looked quite ordinary. A wardrobe to the left allowed for their jackets to be deposited. And if what hung there was any indication, Blondie and his flatmate had different clothing styles for sure. Designer jackets hung right next to more comfortable ones looking like the one that he had on.

The shoes standing in neat rows could have passed as baby coffins in his mind, but he held his tongue. No need to offend his companion. The other shoes looked like trainers he would wear, and this threw him for another loop.

What did all of this mean? Were he and the blond flatmates?

He caught a look of his reflection in the mirror that was attached on the opposite wall. He was a bit shorter than the other guy and his hair looked as if it had a life of its own. When he tried to pat it down just because he could, it jumped up again - so much for that - and he had a peculiar scar on his forehead, almost like a lightning bolt. He wondered for a second how he had acquired that.

His eyes had an almost unnatural green colour, pure and deep, although whoever had sold him his glasses clearly didn't have much love for him. The large round frames hid his face much more than necessary. He frowned a bit and resolved to get another pair as soon as he had figured out what was going on.

“Hello? Are you done ogling yourself?” The impatient voice called him and he jumped again. That was becoming a bad habit, pretty fast.

They stepped further into the house and saw a neat kitchen. The table was set with two placemats as if they always lay there, pots and pans were lined up and it smelled good. Something was in the oven, and without a thought he grabbed the oven mitts and took the roast from it. Settling it on the table he started a bit when his partner said: “Well you have been here before, that much is obvious.”

“It just felt natural.” So why did he feel a sliver of unease travel through him now?

“If you are done being so domestic; we probably should look through the house some more?”

They stepped into a study that looked well lived-in. Photos lined the mantelpiece, and if they had questioned before that they were close, looking at these pictures made it clear that they had at least spent quite some time together.

His mouth dropped open. If he had any doubt, now it was clear that the blond and he were a couple. In one picture the other guy even kissed him, and it was not a friendly peck on the cheek! He blushed beetred. 

Some pictures showed them together, and what a striking pair they made: darkness and light, lean elegance and solid, condensed power. Some showed them with other couples, laughing and carefree. They obviously liked to travel, judging from how many locations could be seen in the background of the pictures.

They found a picture with a kid in their middle. The little one appeared to be five or so with blond hair but what floored them both was the scribble beneath:

“Teddy with his favorite uncles Harry and Draco”

“Well now we know our names at least,” Draco said.

Harry was flabbergasted that Draco appeared to take this so easily.

“Hello? Draco, don't you think this is strange?”

“What is strange, Harry? Waking up in front of a house, with you, not remembering who I am, finding out I live with you? Seeing myself kissing you? Hell yes, it is strange, but what do you expect me to do? Run out screaming? Does it shock me, that I am gay?”

Harry nodded. How could Draco remain so calm about this?

Draco cocked his head. “No, the being gay thing isn’t all that surprising. It just… feels right.”

Harry, simply turned around and looked. “We still need to find the bedroom.” He still held onto the hope that this was all a huge misunderstanding, maybe they would find two bedrooms, instead of one.

Draco smiled. “Well then, Harry.” His voice was more a purr than anything else. “Lead the way.”

Harry still felt uneasy. There was nothing that gave him a reason to doubt, but the nagging voice in the back of his mind just wouldn't shut up. He resolutely pushed it aside and went out of the living room.

The bedroom left him speechless, and he was very sure that he had not decorated it. He was also sure now that a misunderstanding was out of the question.

The big bed dominated the scene. It was covered in a navy-blue duvet that begged for a dive under it, but the rest of the room was decorated in soft creams that offset the dark blue. It was a perfect blend of who they appeared to be. Draco stood in middle looking right at home where he was. 

Harry smiled. “So do you think I should call the doctor so that we can try to get this fixed?”

“What do you mean call? Nobody is outside.” 

Harry laughed. “No on the phone. silly!” 

Draco frowned. “I don't know what a _phone_ is.” He sounded insecure, and Harry had the feeling that this was an expression that wasn’t natural to the blond. 

“Draco,” he asked softly. “How much do you remember about everyday life?” 

Draco began to think and paled with each passing moment. “Nothing. It is like I am completely blank. But I understand English and I know that I like expensive things. And I know that I know you, not matter how strange that sounds.” 

Harry nodded. “I think I have a bit more memories left. During the trip through the house, I got flashes up until I am eleven, but then I am drawing a blank line. I know enough that I can call a doctor to get an appointment.” 

Harry turned around, ready to leave the bedroom to go back to the living room where he had seen a telephone, when it happened. His foot caught the edge of a throw rug and he pitched forward. He saw the corner of the bedpost rush up to him and then - nothing.

He had expected the impact to be extremely painful, but instead he was hovering, as if he had a rubber band attached to his back. He twisted to see Draco still standing on the other side of the room, hands flung out as if he wanted to hold onto him. Beads of perspiration stood on his forehead and he lowered his hands slowly. Harry dropped on the floor at the same speed.

Once he was on the floor securely, Harry tried to gather his wits.

“Draco?” Harry tried to sound calm and reasonable

“Yes?” Draco sounded slightly winded.

“Did you just use telekinetic powers to catch me? Or am I hallucinating?”

Draco shrugged. “I think it was me, I saw you trip and just reacted. If you had caught the corner of the bedpost, I think amnesia would be our smallest problem. And somehow I knew I could slow your fall at least. Although it was much more exhausting than I expected.”

Harry took another deep breath. Old snippets rang in his ears “Freak” - “There is no such thing as magic” “My good for nothing sister! Had to go and get herself killed!”

Harry aimed for a normal tone. “Draco do you believe in magic?”

Draco contemplated his question. “I think - I have to believe in supernatural powers at least. The thought of magic existing does not fill me with doubt. It feels a bit as it felt with knowing I am gay. It feels natural.” he nodded again as if he needed to confirm that what he just said still held true.

Harry gathered himself and pushed into a sitting position. “Draco, what if our situation has to do to with your special powers?” 

Draco’s head whipped around. “What do you mean? Do you think I made our memories disappear? Why would I wipe my own memories then?”

Harry winced. Put like that is sounded really strange. But one thing was clear. “There is no way, I can call a normal doctor. If what you did really is magical then they will do experiments with you, just to find out how you did it.”

Draco raised an eyebrow. “And you know that how?”

Harry thought about that. “I remember that my aunt always said that magic was nonsense and that if they should ever catch such a freak, he needed to be put down.” Draco paled at that.

Harry continued. “Oh wait that was Aunt Marge - she said it was in the blood.”

“You have a lovely family,” Draco managed to sneer only slightly.

Harry laughed helplessly.

“Now what?” Draco asked.

“Okay, we have a lovely roast downstairs, we obviously live here together and I remember a bit more than you do. For now I suggest we go and have dinner, and then we will see what we can find out when we search the house for clues.”

Draco smiled. “That sounds very good. I am starving. And that roast did smell wonderful!”

They both went back to the kitchen. Harry dished out the food while Draco put out cutlery and selected a wine to go with the dinner. He uncorked it and poured both of them a glass.

As they settled down for dinner, Harry tried the wine and winced. 

Draco noticed this. “Is something wrong with the wine?” He took a sip and frowned. “Hm, it is not the best wine but it is palatable. I am hazarding the guess you don't like wine.”

Harry shrugged. “I don't think it is my favourite drink. I think, I am more of a beer person.”

Draco grinned, but got up and opened the doors in the kitchen one after the other, until he had found the fridge, and he found a beer in there. Putting it down in front of Harry, he resumed eating.

This here, felt natural. No matter how surreal the circumstances of this evening meal were. Harry was intrigued.

They finished their dinner in silence, a comfortable silence.

Later they retreated into the living room, checking the pictures for a clue, but finding nothing.

“Maybe we should try if you can do magic as well,” Draco said.

Harry whipped around. “Are you kidding me? Why would I have the same abilities?” But even as he got the words out, he knew that Draco was right. What was to say that he didn’t have the same abilities? “So how do you suggest we go about this?” Harry cooked his head.

Draco smiled enigmatically. “Maybe you should just think about something you want, really want.”

Harry blushed again. What was it about Draco that made him so insecure, was he usually a person that blushed? Somehow he doubted that. 

“Earth to Harry, are you with me?” Draco's eyes twinkled mischievously.

Harry smiled as well. “I should think about something I really, really want?” 

“Oh yes.”

“Okay” and Harry thought hard about the dessert he had loved ever since he had been able to sneak a tiny piece of it from a formal dinner that Petunia had made for Vernon’s boss. “Well that is that.” 

He was torn from his wistful thinking when Draco shook his arm.

And there it stood - right in the middle of the table, in all its delicious glory.

A wonderful treacle tart.

“Did you?” he had to ask. 

Draco shook his head amusedly. “No that was all you. To be honest I have no idea what that is?”

Harry laughed and got them both a fork. “Enjoy the deliciousness that is treacle tart!” Just for this moment he didn’t want to think about the consequences of what he had just done.

Once they were both full to burst Draco sat down on the couch and looked pensively at Harry.

“I guess this means we both won't try to see a doctor, or whatever you wanted to call this afternoon. If they want to dissect me for stopping a fall, they surely would want to do the same when you manage to make food out of thin air.” 

“So we won't try to get medical help. Do you think whatever caused this will disappear on its own after a while?” 

Draco pondered his question. “Well, you have a lot of memories of your childhood right? I don't have a clear memory of my parents right now, but I do know that I didn't live in the city. This here just doesn't feel like my childhood. And I am very sure that I didn't grow up in poverty. We both know how to do everyday things, like talking and writing and we can read. So I don't think it is a trauma induced amnesia. I think something caused this, and yes, I am pretty sure it has to do with magic. Maybe it will disappear over night?”

Harry yawned. “Maybe getting some sleep can help us get a clear head, and maybe tomorrow we will know more.”

Draco stretched and made to get up, Harry stopped him, blushing again.

“Uhm.” This was so embarrassing. If they were the couple that he had seen in all of their pictures, how could he ask this?

“What?” 

“Uhm, do you plan on sleeping with me?”

Draco looked slightly startled at that, but then a seductive smile stole over his face and he chuckled. “Why Harry, I certainly find you fit enough to seriously consider it.”

Harry felt nauseous all of a sudden and when Draco stepped closer, his stomach heaved and he bolted out of the room. The nausea stopped when the door closed behind him, and he took a deep breath. Once he was sure he would not throw his dinner up on Draco’s feet, he stepped back out.

Draco was at his side immediately.

“Harry, are you okay?” At Harry’s weak nod Draco continued. “I was joking! Even if we are a couple, I would definitely try to get to know you a bit better before jumping into bed with you. Although seeing as we don't have a large couch and the bed in the kids’ room is way too small, I believe we do have to sleep in the same bed.”

Harry looked at Draco and saw the concern written clearly in the grey eyes. Just for a split second he imagined them cold and angry and the handsome face much younger and twisted in an ugly sneer. But the image was gone again in an instant and he leaned into the arm that curled protectively around his shoulder. He still felt queasy and just wanted to go to bed.

“Just for the record,” Draco said once he had wrapped himself up in the comforter. “I hope you really don't mind sleeping with me?”

Harry laughed softly. “Get into bed, you prat and don't hog the covers.” And with that he drifted off to sleep.

The next morning found him entangled with his bed partner, who had indeed hogged the covers and had pulled Harry into his arms like an overly large stuffed teddy bear. He felt warm and breathed the unique smell of Draco in. Once his brain fully registered what he was doing he also noticed that he felt slightly nauseous again. Harry tried to extricate himself from Draco without waking him, but found his legs trapped between Draco’s. One foot dangled over the edge of the bed and Harry once again found himself fascinated by the sheer size of those appendages. They must be at least a thirteen or even larger. Compared to his own feet they really were something to look at, elegant and slender with perfect toes. His own knobbly toes seemed to mock him lightly - see this is what a sexy foot is supposed to look like! 

Where did these crazy thoughts come from? Harry renewed his efforts to get out of the bed and was almost successful, when all of a sudden the arm around his waist tightened for a bit, and he felt a kiss being pressed to the side of his neck.

Harry froze. Was Draco dreaming? Please let him dream - he prayed. He was nowhere near ready to resume their relationship. Whatever deity had been listening, it was a kind one and Draco relaxed his hold on Harry. Enough so that he could wiggle out of the bed and get to the bathroom.

Once he stood under the shower he felt the residual nausea recede, and relaxed a bit. Washed and dried he stepped back into the bedroom to gather new clothes, with just a towel slung low on his hips. He was searching for something to wear when he heard Draco´s voice from the bed.

“Morning! Now that is a view I could get used to.”

Startled Harry dropped the towel but gathered it quickly back up again. By god he had never been so embarrassed before!

“Must you startle me so?” he snarled.

“Wow, when you roar like that, I might think I have a lion in my bedroom.” Draco was all lazy smiles. And Harry almost wanted to smack that grin out of his face, but then he began to laugh himself. It was comical in a way, and somehow he didn't have it in him to stay mad.

Draco got up, clad only in a t-shirt and pants and Harry found his mouth incredibly dry all of a sudden.

Unwilling to examine his feelings on the matter closer, he jumped into a jeans and a t-shirt of his own and dashed into the kitchen. Getting breakfast started, sounded like a splendid idea in his mind.

Checking the cupboards brought him a couple of revelations. They both liked different things, coffee and tea. He was almost one hundred percent sure that Draco was more for tea and he would like coffee better, although how he knew that was beyond him at this point. He also saw that they were almost out of groceries and would need to go shopping.

So he prepared a cup of tea for Draco - adding milk and just a dash of sugar and his own coffee, black. When Draco stepped into the kitchen he was pleasantly surprised to find the tea waiting for him.

“How did you know I take my tea like that?”

Harry looked at Draco over the rim of his coffee cup and shrugged. “Automatisms? I just went with what felt right. If you rather want coffee I am happy to share.”

Draco took one look at the black beverage and shuddered visibly. “No thanks, I'll stick to tea.”

“We need to go grocery shopping, by the way.”

Draco raised an eyebrow. “We need to do what?” 

Harry sighed. “We need to buy food.”

Draco looked back blankly. “And how are we going to do that? Do we have money here? And where does one buy foodstuff?”

Harry pinched his nose. This was going to be a long day!

\-------------------------------------

Finding a supermarket was not the hard part. Harry had found enough money in his pockets to pay for a month worth of groceries, along with a couple strange looking coins that looked familiar but that he couldn't quite place. And the supermarket had been drawn into the map that lay underneath the kitchen counter. Mindful of heavy items they might have to carry home, Harry had even found a small trolley that he could pull behind him.

All of that was nothing - the reason he was going to go ballistic was tall, blond, gorgeous and annoying.

“Draco for the last time. You can't just buy random stuff because you don't know what it is or does. I assure you, we don't need shoe polish in four colors and we also don't need ten different toothpastes. You picked an egg beheader? What on earth!” Harry was exasperated and he felt a headache coming on.

Draco looked at him guiltily. It was true he had NO idea what to buy in this “supermarket,” but instead of admitting that, he just dropped things into the trolley he thought might come in handy. He wished the unnecessary stuff would just disappear.

Harry turned around, in time to see all of the items which had piled up disappear, just like that. Draco paled and looked around wildly, but thankfully nobody had seen them.

“Okay are you ready to buy the things we really need now?” Harry inquired. 

Draco nodded. He still asked a ton of questions, but at least Harry got to pick up what he was sure they would need, potatoes, carrots, leeks, onions, mince meat, and a lot of other basic foods.

He couldn´t resist the crips and dropped two bags into the trolley. Draco raised his eyebrow. “What is that?” 

Harry grinned. “You will see tonight when we are watching the telly.”

Lugging all of it home was exhausting and Harry wished for the trolley just to be a bit lighter when all of a sudden he felt like he was pulling an empty trolley behind him. Turning his head he saw that the trolley was still packed, but now it felt as if there was nothing in there. 

He grinned. If it was indeed magic, it sure was practical!

The rest of the day was uneventful. They prepared a simple dinner and Harry was well aware that he simply knew a lot of things without having a memory of how and why. He knew Draco hated spinach but adored aubergines and that he refused to touch liver, although a steak and kidney pie would be okay.

And he knew Draco had no clue what a telly was, although he himself had seen it at the Dursleys. Evening found them perched onto the sofa, watching an old movie and Harry had to explain how exactly the apparatus worked. 

They sat quite close to one another and Draco had his arm slung around Harry's shoulder, but every time Harry relaxed into Draco’s shoulder he would experience another flash of unease and nausea. It made him wonder if he was generally ill, because this surely couldn't be normal? 

Once he made himself a cup of chamomile tea he felt better again. Surely it was just nerves. After all he lived here with his partner, and Draco was so much more at ease with his sexuality than Harry. It did make him nervous. No wonder his stomach was in knots. At the same time he knew without a doubt that Draco would never do anything to hurt him. Draco had his back, just like he would have his if needed.

The next morning found them entangled in bed once again. Harry was spooned tightly against Draco and used as a teddybear once again.

Harry took a deep breath and inhaled the unique smell that he had come to associate already with Draco. Or maybe it was a memory. He wasn't quite sure what was new and what old knowledge but lying here in the embrace, he felt cherished and loved.

Draco stirred and pressed close against Harry´s backside. Harry felt him inhale and couldn't keep from smiling. When Harry edged a bit closer to the comfortable warmth behind him he felt something very hard and very warm push into the cleft of his arse. The blood shot into Harry’s face when his brain caught up with the rest of his traitorous body. Not only was Draco’s morning wood digging into his arse, but his own cock was rock hard as well.

Harry was sure he had never felt as aroused as he did in that moment, but just as he began to push back a bit against the solid presence behind him, the nausea returned once again. By now Harry was pretty much convinced this was not entirely natural but he wasn't sure if he should talk to Draco about it. Then again, it wasn't likely Draco could do anything about it.

So Harry removed himself a bit from Draco and the nausea receded.

Getting up and under the shower already had a bit of routine and Harry felt more and more secure in his skin. He belonged here. Today he would go through the documents, he had found in his office and maybe it would bring some light into this mystery.

Breakfast found them sharing a comfortable silence again. Draco sipped his tea and looked fascinated into the newspaper that had found its way into their entry hall. Harry found it endearing.

Later he wanted to wash up but Draco smiled at him and said. “Go on, I can clean up, I watched you yesterday. I think I am capable of cleaning up after myself. Although I admit it feels a bit strange. But then again, what is normal anymore?”

And that was how Harry found himself sitting at the desk, trying to make heads and tails of what he was reading, but most of it appeared to be written in Latin or something, and he couldn't really make sense of what he was seeing.

This was how Draco found him.

He looked over Harry’s shoulder frowning a bit before he said. “I can read this, but those are potions recipes. Do you think one of us makes these?” 

Harry snorted. “I can't even read this stuff. So it is obvious out of the two of us you are making potions.” he turned around and looked up at Draco. Something in the way he did that must have triggered the reaction in the blond, because he swooped down and kissed Harry square on the mouth. Harry was glad he was sitting down because that kiss made his knees weak.

It wasn't as if he felt fireworks or butterflies, but he felt a sense of rightness. It was like coming home after having traveled for a lifetime. Warmth spread through him and he felt as if a snake coiled in his gut. He felt Draco’s tongue exploring his mouth, felt himself give in and melt into the warm frame. But just as he leaned back on the desk to allow Draco more space between his legs, the nausea came back. Harry willed himself to ignore the feeling and pulled Draco closer to him.

It was no use, the closer he pulled Draco, the stronger the nausea grew. Regretfully he pulled away. “I can't Draco, I am sorry!” Draco stepped back and took a deep breath.

“Okay. Well we know at least that we are physically compatible.” He smiled at Harry and left the office as if he couldn't trust himself not to bend Harry over the desk and simply have his way with him. And Harry shivered at the thought. He wanted it, but something was holding him back. 

The day didn't bring any new revelations but it ended again with them on the couch cuddled together.

Over the next few days they developed something of a routine. They would wake up tangled closely together and Harry would enjoy the physical closeness for as long as he could. He began to wonder if he should just push through the nausea and just risk being sick. He wanted to be close to Draco in every way, but this made him hold back.

Then they had breakfast together, Harry would go back to the office and Draco would read in one of the books that they found in their small library. In the afternoons they would go shopping and explore the neighborhood.

In the evenings, Harry would prepare dinner for them, After the first time, Draco had started to help, and although they were bickering back and forth like an old married couple, Harry began to suspect that he had been very happy with Draco. They just fit in every way.

They regained parts of their memories but they were hazy. Draco thought he remembered his father being called Lucius and his mother Narcissa. His wry exclamation that weird names at least ran in the family made Harry smile.

They also were pretty sure that they had gone to school together and that their relationship must have started later. Harry shared one night that he had flashbacks of Draco looking coldly at him, to which Draco admitted that he had the same flashbacks only of Harry’s eyes being mad. Hilarious was the moment when he remembered that Harry had worn those awful glasses already back in school, Draco couldn’t resist teasing Harry. He loved it when those green eyes flashed.

Running in the park they had found on one of their strolls also made one thing very clear. They were evenly matched in speed, but both had a fierce competitive streak, so they turned their jogs into full blown races each time. It was exhilarating and Harry felt so free, even though he complained in jest that Draco was at an unfair advantage with his huge feet.

Draco had simply scooped him up the first and only one time he had said it and had carried him over the threshold bridal style saying with a laugh. “At least my big feet keep me balanced enough for this.“ Harry had felt his ears grow warm again and held his mouth shut ever since.

Another day later, Harry had dragged Draco to the optician to get himself another pair of glasses. Although Draco admitted that they had kind of grown on him, he acquiesced that Harry could do much better. After what felt trying on hundreds of frames, they decided on a simple silver, rectangular model that didn't hide quite as much of Harry's face.

Life was good – but good things never last forever.

Draco had tried to take their relationship to the next level, but Harry still felt nauseous every time they kissed or heaven forbid did more. One morning things came to head. Harry woke up in Draco's arms like he had come to expect and like over the last twelve days or so. But he also woke up to fingers stroking his backside rather insistently. Conflicting emotions warred inside of him. On the one hand he wanted to give himself to Draco fully . They were so good as a couple, they could be silent together and Harry valued that so much in him. They could laugh together and Draco’s kisses made him melt. On the other hand every attempt of physical closeness that went beyond cuddling almost made Harry throw up.

Draco kissed his neck and Harry moaned, he felt like his entire body was on fire. But when Draco breached him with his finger carefully, Harry jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom, where he was violently sick. After he was done throwing up, Harry brushed his teeth and tried to get his shaking limbs back under control.

He was half afraid to go back outside. If he had learned anything about Draco in the last few days was that he did not take rejection well and for sure his flight must have looked like the mother of all rejections to him. But then again, hiding had never solved problems, so he squared his shoulders and stepped into the bedroom again. 

Only to find it empty.

Draco had gone into the kitchen, made the coffee for him and his own tea. Harry took in his appearance and flinched.

Draco looked angry. “You know Harry, I thought over the last few days we had made good progress on getting to know each other. And I also thought you enjoyed my company and what we had together. But I think you lied.“

Harry froze. The voice Draco used was so cool and detached, as if he had forced himself into another place inside his mind. And in that second Harry realised something. He never wanted to be the reason why Draco sounded so hurt again, because that was the underlying current - pure hurt.

“Draco,“ he attempted to say something, but Draco cut him off.

“Look Harry, I know that we don't remember much but I thought you would be at least honest enough to tell me if the thought of being with me was so revolting it made you sick! Do you really think I want to be with you if you have to force yourself to answer my kisses? Maybe you don´t feel what I feel. All I know is that you drive me crazy with want, and that I wanted to wake up with you in my arms forever. And I think I love you, but if my touch makes you sick, well then far be it from me to force you to be with me! And it makes me wonder if our relationship hasn't been one sided for the entire time and you are just humoring me.“

Draco looked tired and defeated. It wasn't a look that Harry ever wanted to see on his face again.

Harry stood there gaping for a second before he crossed the kitchen and grasped Draco fingers.

“Are you quite done now?“ Draco looked up. His face was set in a defiant scowl, but his eyes betrayed him. They showed his hurt and Harry fell a little more in love with this proud man. “I know without a shadow of a doubt, that I have fallen in love with a wonderful man, over the course of the last couple days. It is a guy who doesn't remember anything about cooking and still attempts to help out. Someone who gives me time to adjust to being gay. A guy who holds me every night and who goes for a run with me. Someone who makes me coffee although he prefers tea and who doesn´t mock me for drinking beer when he loves wine.“

Draco fixated his eyes on Harry's face as if looking for a deception.

Harry continued. “So don't tell me anything about me not being in love with you. Because I am a guy and fuck if I know much about telling someone that I am in love with them.“

Draco laughed, but is sounded half like a sob. “You are doing a good job, so far.“

Harry turned serious again. “But it is true, every time you kiss me, or touch me in anyway that goes beyond a friendly hug, I am starting to get sick. I had hoped it would wear off, or just be something that has been caused through the amnesia, but it remained as strong as it was the first time you kissed me. I should have told you. But I didn't because goddamnit I wanted it to go away!“

Harry was pacing now. “I don't remember being with anyone, so being with you would be like the first time and I want that with someone who is like you. Who accepts me just the way I am and who takes so much care with me. And I sure as hell don't want to be puking my guts out when you come inside me for the first time.“

Draco's eyes dilated. “You want me to top?“ 

Harry half laughed. ”Don´t tell me you didn´t notice me pushing my arse into your groin?“ 

Draco laughed incredulously. “Well to me you have been blowing hot and cold. In the mornings you are rubbing yourself against me like a lion in heat and then you are jumping out like I have poked you with a hot iron. What was I to think?“

Harry shook his head. “The hot iron part is true, although I liked the iron quite a bit.“ Draco snorted and Harry hurried to continue. “Okay, you do have a point. I should have said something. But now what? Are we at least clear on the fact that I am in love with you and won't go anywhere?“

Draco smiled - a tiny smile – but a smile nonetheless. “Okay, but next time I would like it if you would talk to me - you stubborn guy? How am I supposed to help if you don´t talk to me?“

Harry shook his head a little, but he had to concede the point.

Draco took a deep breath. “I think I would like to go out now for a bit. I need to clear my head. I'll grab some groceries on the way back. I´ll even take my mobile with me, okay?“

Harry wanted to protest. He wanted to ask Draco to come with him, like they had done the last few days, but he sensed that Draco needed space and would come back. Then they would sort this out.

“Okay. Don't keep me waiting?“ he smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring way.

Draco came back and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “Don't doubt that I love you too. I'll be back soon. I just need to clear my head a bit.“

Little did they know that their life was about to be turned upside down again.

Harry was left with cleaning up and he did so until the kitchen sparkled. He made the bed and picked up the laundry when he heard a sound like a loud crack in his apartment. He looked in the kitchen but found it empty. Maybe he had misheard, after all the house was not new and maybe the pipes had played a trick on him. Unfortunately the next thing he heard was not a pipe cracking.

“Mate, I am so glad that we have found you!“

Harry whirled around. There was a guy standing in his living room, and he was sure there had been no one before.

“How did you get in there and who the bloody hell are you?“

The Redhead looked at him incredulously. “Okay, what has Malfoy done with you?“

“Draco hasn't done anything to me and why would he? We are married after all.“

All color drained from the strange guy’s face.

“Oh bloody hell, please tell me you remember who you are, who I am and who the ferret is. Tell me you did not wake up without your memories here.“

Red (as Harry dubbed him in his mind) was pacing and Harry just looked at him. “Again, how did you get into our house? I know you don't have a key, and Draco is out buying groceries. So you have ten seconds to explain to me why you are here, before I decide to call the police on you.“

The guy turned around and his mouth twisted in a pained grimace. “That bad huh? Okay, let me start at the beginning. You, Harry Potter, are a wizard.“

“Yes I noticed that, who are you?“

“My name is Ron Weasley. I am your Auror partner and Draco Malfoy is the expert for Magical Artifacts that the department of Muggle relations insisted ,that we had to bring in.“

Harry felt a headache come on. “I`ll need a cuppa for this conversation.“ He stepped into the kitchen and calmed himself through the familiar motions. Once he had his coffee, he sat down at the kitchen table and motioned for Ron to sit.

“Wait a second, I am calling Draco, you can tell us both what on earth is going on.“

He took out the phone and punched in the number. “Draco, it`s Harry please come home. Something came up regarding our situation.“

Ron, as he had introduced himself, looked at him strangely. “So you are getting on well?“

“Seeing as we are married, as I said once before, yes we have been getting on well. Not that this is any of your business.“

Ron shook his head and muttered “Oh you are so not going to like what I`ll tell you. I just hope they can fix this at St. Mungo’s, otherwise we are in big trouble.“

Harry felt a pang of sympathy towards the guy. He didn't feel any bad vibes coming from him and he had an open and friendly face.

The door opened and Draco’s voice sounded through the flat. “Harry I came home as fast as possible. What happened?“ He came into the kitchen and Harry marveled at the fact that he could read the exact moment Draco closed himself off due to the stranger in their kitchen.

“Draco, this is Ron, he says he knows what has happened to us and why we can't remember anything.“

Ron got up and stretched his hand towards Draco who took it without hesitation. “Okay NOW I know you both really don't remember,“ he exclaimed.

“And why would that be?“ Draco requested mildly.

“Because the Draco Malfoy I love to despise would rather sneer at me than shake my hand.“ It was said with a slightly incredulous headshake.

“So you tested me – how strategically thought.“ Draco raised an eyebrow.

Ron chuckled. “Well you would usually call it Slytherin thinking.“

Harry reminded them they had more pressing matters to attend. “Okay Ron, what has happened, and why have we been here for almost two weeks before you found us?“

Ron heaved a sigh. “Because since the alarm went off last week, I have been checking every single safe house all over Britain. This here has been the last one we checked. The magical trace on your rings deactivated once the artifact had been fully activated. But I should probably start at the beginning?“

Draco and Harry both nodded.

“You both work for the Ministry of Magic. Harry you are an Auror – something close to law enforcement, and you Malfoy are an expert on Magical Artifacts. Lately we have noticed an increase in Alzheimer disease amongst the Muggle population and what is worse, the cases are all accelerated. Meaning the diseases doesn´t take years, it takes months until all of the memories are gone. Even young people are affected. We discovered that some dark wizards had got their hands on memory globes and have disguised them as snow globes, distributing these amongst Muggles, prolonged exposure then leading to this memory loss. What hasn’t been tested so far is what happens if a wizard sets off the spells on the object.“

Ron paused and scratched his head. “Well, now we do know what happened, you forget magic and everything to do with magic. Which is why you, Harry, probably can remember everything up till your eleventh birthday. Draco has basically forgotten everything about his life since he has been ensconced in magic for his entire life. Although we don't know exactly if you´ll get all the memories back, if they are really gone or just buried. You will get extensive checkups at St. Mungo’s and we will have to get you back into your lives.“

Harry looked up at that, but somehow he did not like the sound of this. 

Draco stepped in once again. “What do you mean back to our lives? Do enlighten us. What we have forgotten about that, what is so important?”

Ron winced, it was clear he didn't really want to talk about this. Somehow that made Harry even more determined to get to the bottom of it. So he and Draco were part of a law enforcement operation, what was the big deal then?

“Youarentacouple.” At first Harry was sure he had misheard. Surely Ron was making a joke?

“Please repeat that, at a normal pace. Surely you have been taught better!” Draco's scathing reply made Harry even more nervous.

Ron swallowed. “You and Harry, you aren't a real couple. It was part of the mission. Most of the Muggles targeted were homosexuals and we thought it would work better if you posed as a couple so that the suspects wouldn´t be suspicious.”

Harry only heard a buzzing sound in his ears. His brain refused to process what he just heard. But then he managed to get out. “You mean I am not gay? But the pictures? And the rings?” And what he couldn’t say out and what was the most important thing - why had it felt so natural to be with Draco, to sleep next to him and kiss him, love him, even if they had not got around to having sex.

Ron looked pained. “Harry, you have to believe me, we didn’t think it would go that far to destroy all of you memories connected to magic. The pictures are real.” Harry felt relieved. So at least they had had some kind of connection before and not everything that had felt so natural during the last week had been a lie. “You two have been friends for a couple of years now and Teddy brings you both together quite often, which is why you are in so many pics with him. Teddy is your cousin, Draco and Harry is the Godfather.”

Draco got back to the real issue at hand. “But we are not a married couple.” 

Ron shook his head, almost sympathetically. “No you aren't married. In fact, Draco, as far as I know, you are engaged to Astoria Greengrass.” 

Harry knew that Ron wasn´t saying everything and he burst out. “And what about me? Am I single at least?” 

Ron turned pale. “Mate you don´t mean that! You are engaged to my sister!”

Harry had heard enough. The buzzing grew louder and louder in his ears until he didn't hear anything anymore. He didn’t really notice when Ron transported him to St. Mungo’s and he welcomed the respite he received when the Healers pumped him full of potions to aid his process of memory recovery.

When he came back to himself, he smelt disinfectant and something else uniquely hospital. He groaned and his head felt like he had been hit by a bludger. Had he lost another Quidditch game against Draco, or had the bastard cheated again at playing catch? It was really unfair that he had such big feet and could run so fast.

He sat up so fast that his head was spinning. Oh Fuck! He remembered everything, from the boa in the zoo until the first time on a broom, casting the all deciding Expelliarmus and the results. He remembered the trials, Draco's pale face and the tentative friendship they had built over the last years. He remembered the rows he had had with Ginny in the beginning and the slow acceptance once they realised that he wouldn't let go of Draco and Narcissa. Because after all, in a way they were all he had left of his family.

He remembered working on the case with Draco and being asked to pose as a couple. And he also remembered the night he had gone out and drank himself into an absolute stupor because Draco had told him that he was going to get married to Astoria Greengrass, due to an old betrothal contract Lucius had set up before Draco had even been born. 

Two days later he had asked Ginny to marry him. He was well and utterly fucked, but before he could contemplate this further, the door opened and a friendly looking nurse entered the room.

“Hello, Mr Potter, I am glad to see you are with us again. Healer Ploughs will be with you in a minute.”

Harry shook his head, trying to clear it from the myriad of thoughts running through his mind, trying to focus on the situation at hand.

The man entering his room, was short and had a smile that reminded Harry of a Cheshire cat.

“Ah, Mr Potter, it is good to see you awake. We were afraid the procedure to retrieve your memories would leave you unconscious for longer.”

Harry croaked out at that. “How is Draco?”

Healer Ploughs smiled again. “Don't fret, your friend is still sleeping but his monitoring values show that he is on the path of recovery as well. Seeing as he has to regain eleven more years than you do, this is to be expected though.”

Harry sighed, the relief flooding him was immense.

Healer Ploughs frowned a bit. “Mr Potter, I need to talk to you about something we have found though, when we checked you through.” He continued to talk and what he heard made Harry’s world crumble again, but it also put a lot of things into perspective for him.

\-----------------------------------------------------  
After coming home he avoided the coming confrontation for as long as he could, which was only a day. But that gave him time to settle into a mindset that didn't demand that he stormed where he wanted to storm, screaming and ranting.

If he had learned anything throughout the last years, it was that yelling at people when they pissed you off rarely got you a result that you were proud of for long.

Harry knew that he needed to be calm for the talk he had to have with his fiancée.

And calm he was. When he arrived at the Burrow he saw her stand there. A radiant smile painted her beautiful face, but all he felt was coldness and all he could taste was ashes.

“Harry!” Joyfully she ran up to him, ready to throw herself into his arms. He sidestepped her. “We need to talk, Ginny.” Without waiting if she followed him he stepped inside, he walked through the kitchen. 

“You wouldn’t know by any chance who put the _caveo fides_ charm on me?”

She paled but raised her chin stubbornly. “It was a mild fidelity charm, nothing harmful, it just reminded you that you belonged with me.”

“Because the fact that I had asked you to marry me wasn’t enough?” Harry almost didn’t recognise his own voice, it sounded grave and angry.

Ginny shrank back, her eyes swam with tears but Harry didn’t feel anything beyond relief. So it wasn't that his body told him in a strange way that he didn't really want to be with Draco or didn't love him. It really was the charm that had kept him from letting go and had caused the bouts of nausea.

Harry swallowed the fury down that rose in his throat. Ginny of all people should have known that he despised being manipulated. And although now he was clear headed once more, he was aware that Draco was no blushing maiden, innocent of ever manipulating someone he cared about. Somehow Harry still knew Draco would not stoop so low as to ensure his faithfulness. Draco had too much pride to be so desperate, he would take his chances on Harry, even at the risk of being rejected.

And Harry loved him for that. He sucked in a breath and staggered under the realization that crashed over him.

It was difficult loving like that – uncertainly and without a guarantee of something safe and secure to catch you.

But somehow Harry was sure, now that he had tasted a bit of what it would be like to freely love, unbridled by careful caution and tiptoeing around one another - least one could say something that would upset the other. He knew he could never go back to a more guarded kind of love. It would be like freeing the storm and expecting it to return to a breeze at command, just as it got used to blowing like it is supposed to.

When Ginny reached for him, all he could do was pull back his hand and shrug his shoulders. “I am sorry Gin, but this isn´t working anymore.“

Her eyes filled with tears, but he had to give her credit for refusing to let them fall.

“So this is it? I make one mistake and you run for the hills?“

“It is horribly cliché to say, but Ginny it isn't all you, it is me. I love you, but I am not in love with you. And I think that we both deserve to hear the truth about that. You put a fidelity charm on me because you didn´t trust me to remember our love, and to be honest I wouldn't have remembered. I wanted Draco.“ 

“Get out. I hope he hurts you, just like you hurt me right now.“ She was compellingly beautiful in her desperation, brown eyes blazing and hair wild. But to him she had nothing anymore with her blazing fire, when all he needed was the cloudy grey storm that passed to look like a winter sky, and silver spun silk on his sheets.

“Ginny,“ he tried again, somehow wanting to repair their easy camaraderie, but when the first piece of pottery burst next to his head on the wall, he retreated.

Harry was aware that he risked everything on a love that had no guarantee. No one could tell him if Draco would even want to pursue a relationship, or if he would return to the betrothal contract he had with Astoria Greengrass. But Harry knew he refused to live a lie.

A week passed and the doubts and fears were running wild. He looked like hell, having slept only a little each night, his hair resembled a wild hedgehog and the shadows beneath his eyes were so pronounced, Harry wondered why Hermione hadn´t staged an intervention yet.

He moved into what he called “their“ flat. The house was quiet and the rooms were full of wonderful memories.

Had anyone told him before that you could fall in love over the span of days, he would have scoffed and admitted them to St. Mungo’s, but all it took was a well placed memory charm and a little more than a week of laughter and easy bantering, falling asleep next to one another and waking up entangled in each others arms. 

He only had to close his eyes and he could see Draco sitting across the table with the newspaper, brows drawn together, scoffing about Harry taking coffee black instead of drinking tea like a proper English man.

After the longest week of his life, Harry stood in the kitchen preparing a stew. It would be more than enough for two days, but somehow he refused to believe that Draco truly wouldn't come back. At first his brain refused to comprehend what was happening, but all of a sudden a key was dropped into the bowl and shoes were taken off. His breath caught but he refused to run out and check.

“I would have hoped for a more enthusiastic welcome when I get back, darling!“

The drawl that reached his ear was the most wonderful sound that Harry had ever heard. He turned around slowly and there he was – Draco was home.

“So are you here to stay? Or are you just dropping off the keys?“ Harry´s heart was in his throat, but he needed to hear the words.

Draco inclined his head. “Why would I drop off the keys to my home?“

And that was all it took. Harry dropped the spoon and flung himself across the room, secure in the knowledge that Draco would catch him.

He held onto him for dear life, and when Draco buried his face in Harry's hair, he heard only a whisper. “Mine“ 

Harry tilted his face towards Draco and the kiss between them was so much more than the ones they shared throughout their week. Draco drank Harry’s mouth like a man in the desert would drink fresh water, and Harry knew that tonight he would give himself to this man, nothing holding back, no questions asked.

Draco carried him bridal style into their bedroom and began to undress Harry.

He went slowly to task, as if he was unwrapping a precious gift. Harry felt cherished and safe. His mouth tasted every inch of skin he revealed and once Harry’s torso was naked he already felt like pudding under these hands. His skin tingled and the hot breath on his skin made him feel like he was on fire. When he was divested of his jeans and pants he couldn’t form a coherent sentence any longer. He felt like he would spontaneously combust if the heat between them increased further.

“Draco, please, careful.“ Was all he could pant out.

Draco came back up and kissed him languidly again, his hand stroking slowly over his hard cock and touching him softly, exploring Harry´s balls and his tightly furled pucker. Draco concentrated for a bit and Harry felt a tingle down below. He knew without a doubt that he had just been cleaned thoroughly and laughed a bit breathless.

Draco’s insistent finger slowly breached him. Harry sucked in a breath. It felt strange, to have something inside him, and he was reminded of the first time they had tried this. But tonight there was no nauseousness and he could relax under the ministrations of his lover.

The first finger now disappeared up to the second knuckle and Harry was moaning in pleasure.

“God, if you could see yourself!“ Draco moaned. “You are so beautiful, all spread out for me, and only for me.“

Instead of an answer, Harry pushed back onto the finger and Draco added a second one to continue stretching the tight muscle ring.

Harry let Draco play with him for what felt like an eternity, but before he allowed Draco to claim him as his, he flipped his boyfriend over and descended on Draco’s cock. He knew Draco would soon fuck him into oblivion, but before he surrendered his virginity, he wanted to taste Draco. He admired Draco’s cock – it wasn’t huge, or all that much different from his own, so he did what he liked himself. Tasting another man’s dick was strange at first but Draco’s strangled moans encouraged him, so he continued to suck and lick until Draco pulled him off, already on the edge of his release. Harry found that he was incredibly turned on by the sounds Draco made and wanted to feel that delicious cock inside of him. Draco began using his fingers again to stretch Harry’s hole and any clear thought flew straight out of the window.

Harry couldn’t say how long they played like this but at some point Draco had reduced him to a quivering bundle of need, so he simply turned onto his stomach to present himself and all but begged.

“Please, Draco.“

His lover didn’t need to be asked twice. He lubed himself up and slowly pushed the head of his cock against Harry’s entrance. When he was breached, Harry felt a moment of discomfort, but Draco stilled within him and waited until the slight burn of the first penetration had passed.

Soon Harry got impatient and wiggled his arse in encouragement. Draco picked up the pace and after a few thrusts, he had found the angle at which each move shot a spark through Harry.

It didn’t last long but when Harry felt his orgasm approach it was with an intensity that he had never experienced before. Draco wrapped his hand around his leaking cock and stroked once or twice and Harry came with a grunt, shooting his load onto the mattress beneath him. His clenching muscles took Draco over the edge as well. He tried to pull out but collapsed onto Harry’s back before rolling off. 

“Merlin, I am sorry, did I hurt you, Harry?”

Harry stretched like an overly large cat.

“No, I am perfectly all right. Just so you know, one day I want you to fuck me while I bend over the desk as we tried before.”

Draco chuckled and replied. “That can be arranged. Don't think I'll ever let you go again.”

Snuggling close to Draco, he listened to the steady heartbeat and felt himself drift off to sleep.

There were still many questions that needed to be addressed. 

But here and now? 

Life was as close to perfect as life could ever be. And Harry was happy right where he was.

**Author's Note:**

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